I saw this car and had to snap a photo. I’m not sure if the window sticker is true, or pure irony. On one hand, if they had an accident like that and walked away unscathed, they are INDEED Blessed. But on the other hand, if they were blessed, how did they get into an accident like that in the first place. Hmmm…

 This video came on the monitors when Valerie and I were at lunch this past week at Saddle Ranch and I had forgotten how much this video made me smile. All the dogs are rescues, trained specially for this video, and then given good forever homes. The on-the-money high five STILL thrills me beyond words! OK Go with “White Knuckles.”

Monday the 11th – ROWLF RUNNING! – There were a few last-minute auditions waiting in my inbox to record and e-mail to my agent when I got up at 2. I finished that, and then I headed to my seamstress Shelley’s house to go over her progress on my Rowlf the Dog puppet. We discussed a few tweaks and changes, and then I headed over to my effects guy Jim Ojala’s studio to pick up the original pair of Rowlf eyes I sculpted. He was kind enough to make a mold of them in case I ever wanted to make another pair down the road. I got home and did some work, and enjoyed the very warm night by napping on the couch. When I got up later there were a ton of auditions to do. I finished those and then set about writing Wally’s Week, did some video editing, had some cereal, and then hit the hay.

Tuesday the 12th – MONARCH MANIA! – A phone meeting with my commercial agent was set for noon, and we discussed a few ways to snazz up my commercial demo and website. I took Roxy outside to potty and noticed that it was a very spring-like day…complete with a hoard of…BUTTERFLIES? While standing in my courtyard, hundreds and hundreds of gorgeous, orange butterflies sailed through the courtyard at top speeds. I was talking to a neighbor who said they’re been flying through all of Los Angeles all morning. They’re migrating up from Mexico to Oregon, and BOY are they moving fast! It was a stunning sight! I had never seen that before! I had been planning to meet my pal Bridget Marquardt (from the show “Playboy’s Girls Next Door”) for lunch at 1:30, but my promo agent called and said I had a promo job to do at 2. And the clients would be calling me at that time to listen in to me recording the promo in my home studio! I called Bridget to apologize profusely, and she said we’d meet another time. The guys from Fox called in as planned, we spent about 20 minutes doing the session, and just as I was editing and cleaning up the files to send off, Bridget texted me to let me know she was still in the area and still hungry if I wanted to meet. I told her YES! I got cleaned up and headed to Jerry’s Famous Deli as soon as the files were safely delivered to the Fox folks. Our lunch lasted for two hours and we talked about everything; particularly her new podcast called “Ghost Magnet” that she’s doing with my pal Joe Garner. I introduced them to each other several months back and they sealed a deal for the new podcast. Check it out! It’s creepy fun! After lunch I went to my box to get my packages. In the shipments was my new 12” Scotty figure, to go with my Kirk, Spock, and McCoy figures! He looked amazing! Then I hit the hardware store to get some more washers for the backs of the “Heartbeeps” buttons I had made up at Plastic Depot for my “Heartbeeps/Andy Kaufman” figure which will be on display in this April’s Monsterpalooza museum! I needed the buttons to be metal on the back, because I’m securing them to the jacket with high-powered magnets, so I don’t ruin the fabric of the original costume. I got home and tried to do my auditions, but my gmail was acting funky; particularly in relation to attachments. I couldn’t download anything and it was frustrating. So…I took a short nap. Luckily when I got up later in the evening gmail was working fine. I did a ton of auditions, and a little video editing. It was VERY windy out! I walked Roxy, ate a Tombstone pizza, and watched a few episodes of “I Dream of Jeannie” from the fourth season DVD set. I’m surprised that many shows I’ve watched falter during the third and fourth seasons…but NOT Jeannie, thankfully. VERY entertaining!

Wednesday the 13th – BEST LAID PLANS OF MICE AND WALLY! – After allowing myself to sleep in late and be lazy, I got up late in the afternoon intending to do a bunch of stuff. I had a full day planned, but I got preoccupied with other things around the house and the day escaped me. So I did some auditions and waited for my pal Brittney Powell to come over so we could go have dinner. I hadn’t talked to her since she got back from a 2 week shoot up north, so I wanted to hear all the news. Unfortunately she got a cold while she was filming (the same kind I had a few weeks back) and it was a rough time. After a delicious dinner at Ernie’s, I came home to grab a short nap. I got up later and edited some videos, and did some writing. When I walked Roxy I noticed that “Hooky” (the little bird that has been perching on a metal hook on my patio since last September) wasn’t on the hook. This was the second or third night in a row he was absent from his usual perch, so I’m thinking with the change of weather he decided to seek other accommodations. I had been avoiding using the grill on my patio at night, so as not to scare “Hooky,” but since he wasn’t there I made some hot dogs on the grill and watched a few more episodes of “I Dream of Jeannie.” I wish “Hooky” the best in the spring and summer. He’s welcome back any time.

Thursday the 14th – WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL WALK! – Since it was a stunningly, gorgeous day I decided to walk and do my errands. At noon I walked to Voice Trax West for a session to do 3 commercials for one of my regular clients in Texas. It’s always fun with those folks! I stopped next door to Chin Chin and got some combo fried rice to go, and then walked over to the post office to drop off an eBay sale. I stopped at CVS to pick up some supplies, and saw one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen – wearing suitable ‘spring’ attire. (I love this town!) Then I headed home. What a fantastic walk! I relaxed a bit, and later I took a short nap. Later I got up to do my nightly auditions, made a pot pie and watched more episodes of “Jeannie.”

Friday the 15th – KLUTZ! – When I got up at 11:30 there was an urgent piece of copy for American Airlines in my inbox. They’ve been one of my regular gigs for a long time, so I wanted to turn it around as soon as possible for them. I recorded and edited everything and sent it in, got cleaned up and took Roxy over to Rusty’s to get groomed and bathed. I thought under the circumstances I’d be late for lunch with my pal Valerie Perez at Saddle Ranch on Sunset, but as I pulled up right at 1, she pulled in right behind me. PERFECT timing! As we were chatting a nice French family (tourists most likely) were seated in the booth next to us. They were struggling to take a selfie, so I offered to take it for them. But the sun was coming in through the window behind them and the lighting was looking awful. So, holding the lady’s iPhone, I moved around to the other side of the table to get better light. I had forgotten that the tables we were seated at were elevated by a step, and when I moved around the table as I was looking at the phone to obtain the perfect shot, I fell off the step and DROPPED HER iPHONE! I felt like a heel! And very embarrassed. I apologized profusely, but apparently the phone was OK (thank GOD!) I managed to get several good pictures of them, and even though the phone was OK, I still felt really awful. Stupid American. Boy was I embarrassed. But it all turned out OK. Val told me I should have offered them the chance to drop my phone in exchange, but my phone is an old-fashioned flip phone and those things are bullet proof. It was a funny comment though. On the way back home over the canyon I was seeing more Monarch butterflies! These must’ve been late-comers to the migration game. I got Roxy from the groomer and went home to relax. I did my auditions, so I wouldn’t have any to worry about on Sunday night, and worked around the house a bit. I went to bed to take a nap with Roxy and Spook, and when I got up later I did some more work. I even drove over to the grocery store at 3am to get some supplies for the weekend. I got her a huge bag of Gentle Giants dog food (since I was running low) and put it in the bottom of the cart. When I checked out I pulled the bag up and put it on the conveyor belt. But dog food was leaking all over! There was a nut on the bottom of the cart that snagged the bag and ripped a 4” hole in it! Klutz – take 2! I swear Stan Laurel must’ve been an ancestor of mine! Luckily the security guy had access to some duct tape and we sealed it up nicely. But not until I dropped several handfuls of dog food all over their floor. Disgusted, I went home and put away the groceries, and went to bed to be up for an early hair appointment on Saturday.

Saturday the 16th – MY ‘HAIR’ LADY! – Normally I get my hair needs taken care of during the evenings, but my super-talented stylist Andie just got a full-time job at Fox TV, so her weeks are very full. She’s still handling her regular clients, but only on Saturdays. The only thing she had available was 11am, so I took it. I walked over to get a trim and a touch-up on my color, and then walked home to nap a bit. My pal and webmaster Scott Sebring came over around 5 so we could discuss a complete overhaul of my website wallyontheweb.com! I’ve had it since the late 90’s (hard to believe) and I was one of the first in town to actually have a website used for promotional purposes. In fact, I’ve had it for so long that I can actually remember sending hard copies of photos to my webmistress in Idaho to add to the site! I didn’t have a computer or scanner at home! So, several webmasters later, the site has turned into a “Frankensteined” mish-mosh with a lot of different thumbprints on it. Scott and I have been talking about updating it for a long time, but after my conversation with my agent Peter this past week, the time has come. Unfortunately a lot of the technology that was used when the site was new is no longer available, or “vogue.” So that all has to change. Plus, when I had my site built originally, looking at a website on a phone was a “Star Trekkian” fantasy of the future! Now, it all has to be phone compatible. That way the nice French family can look me up on their broken iPhone and curse my name! I basically told Scott I can no longer be “precious” about any of the old stuff, and whatever stuff is no longer compatible can be taken down. It’s like saying goodbye to old friends, in certain instances, but a lot of that stuff has been up there for about 25 years, so it’s time to go to make way for a “new attitude.” It’s long overdue. Movie night was fun and when it was over, I napped for about an hour. I fed Roxy and then took her on a long, late night stroll through the neighborhood. I enjoyed a really nice cigar on the walk, and the warm evening started making me long for a trip to Palm Springs again. The weather isn’t quite warm enough yet, but it will be very soon and I can’t wait to go again. I came inside and got cleaned up, made my traditional Saturday Night Super Salad, and watched the final episode of “SNL” from the third season DVD set. It was painfully obvious that they were out of ideas and needed a rest. It simply wasn’t very funny. In fact, I think I detected a few reused bits from previous episodes. Some of the bits were so awful I found myself fast-forwarding through them – which I try to never do! It’ll be interesting to see what they come up with for season 4.

Sunday the 17th – St. Patty’s Day (Or is it Paddy’s?)! – When I woke up at 4:30 for evening church, I quickly checked my e-mail before getting ready. I had a potential buyer for an eBay item, but the auction for the item was expiring in a few minutes. He had already bought something from me a few days ago, which was being shipped out on Monday, so he was wondering if I could put the second item in the same box and save postage. I arranged it so he could, and got the item sold. I was a bit late to church, but I’m sure glad I went. The lesson was amazingly poignant, and was talking about things that were relating to issues currently going on in my personal life. It was almost as if Pastor Louise had tapped into my brain! At the end of the service, many of the people were congratulating her on a message that was personally poignant to them. Amazing! The timing couldn’t have been better. I took my ‘adopted grandma’ Shirley over to Paty’s for dinner, but they seemed to be overwhelmed for St. Patrick’s Day. Shirley’s patty melt was taking forever, and the plate my salad was on was scummy and dirty. I sent it back and had a new one made on a clean plate. Her patty melt still hadn’t arrived and she was getting quite hungry. So she had some chicken noodle soup instead, and she canceled the patty melt. On the way home Shirley called the living center in which she lives to let them know she was on her way, and to be there to open the doors. Unlike the other residents in her building, 92 year old Shirley is constantly out and about with a very busy social life. Sometimes it’s hard to get an attendant to open the door for her when she arrives. She called and called and called – but no answer. I drove up to the front and dropped her off, but I never EVER leave until I know she’s safe inside. So I sat there while she continued ringing the doorbell and calling on the phone. No answer in either event. Super pissed (because this happens way too much) I stormed out of my car, walked up to the door, grabbed the handles of the locked door, and shook them so hard I’m surprised the glass didn’t shatter. After hearing something akin to an earthquake or explosion, two attendants came running down. They could tell by the look on my face I was pissed. I told them a 92 year old lady has been calling them for 10 minutes, and ringing the door for 5, and that they needed to do their jobs better. After the horrible service at Paty’s earlier I was beginning to wonder if ANYBODY cared about their jobs any more. They agreed that they needed to do better. Come to find out, the phone number you’re supposed to call to gain entry rings at the front desk. When the attendants are in another part of the building they can’t hear it ring. I told them to get a cordless phone and keep it with them wherever they went in the building, and that I was going to call their manager to make that suggestion. In their defense, they were very apologetic and agreed they needed to do better. I don’t get insanely mad very often, but making a 92 year old lady stand outside and constantly ring to gain access to the building she pays top dollar to live in, was too much. Nobody has pride in their work any longer, I guess. I got home and napped a bit, and then got up later to goof around with my old iPod. It’s a 4gb that I bought ages ago, but it still works nicely. I use it for my walks. So I spent a while stuffing it full of up-tempo walking tunes. I drove to Denny’s to get a salad, and came home to watch “Jeannie” and eat my food. I had a VERY busy day planned for Monday! But again, I’d be confronted by more inept people who have absolutely NO pride in their job or business. More on that next week!

And how was YOUR week??!!


Officer Mark tries out his new lens in Planet Wallywood and gets remarkable results. At least Roxy things so…

During the long, arduous migration, this little guy decided to take a rest for a bit…allowing me to get some great shots of a beautiful specimen!

Adding the Scott figure to my Star Trek display added the perfect balance!

I just KNOW there’s a four-leafed one in here somewhere!

It was hard to communicate just how fast these butterflies moved during their migration. I guess when you only live 12 months, time is of the essence! This will give you a little idea of just how fast they move.