April 7 – April 13 (2014) – Wally On The Web

RANDOM PIC OF THE WEEK

For the full reference to this caption, please watch the movie “Tunnelvision” and look for William Schallert’s piece called “Secret Camera.” It’s always a pleasure meeting Mr. Schallert in person and hearing stories about making “Tunnelvision,” one of my favorite movies!

Saturday night at the “jam” session after the Hollywood Collector Show, Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods performed this song, “Who Do You Think You Are?”, that I had long forgotten. But it sure brought back some good memories, and upon hearing it again, I’m HOOKED!

Monday the 7th – TO QUOTE GARFIELD, I HATE MONDAYS! – As of Friday night/Saturday morning my second to the last tooth on the upper left side of my mouth was hurting something fierce. I had a whopper of a sinus infection! I had just had a full dental work-up just two weeks ago and got a totally clean bill of health! But I had to wait until Monday morning to see my Ear Nose and Throat doctor, the amazing Dr. Grosh in Burbank. I left a message on their overnight voicemail, but when I woke up in severe pain at 9:30am I called the office. I begged to get into to see Dr. Grosh that afternoon, but the attendant on the phone said it wasn’t possible. I interjected, “But I’m a regular patient of his.” She said, “You didn’t let me finish. Dr. Grosh passed away last January in a motorcycle accident.” I could NOT believe my ears. All I could say over and over was, “Oh my God. Oh MY GOD!” It was horrible news to hear at any time, let alone first thing on a Monday morning when you’re in severe pain. I couldn’t even cry I was in such shock. She said that his partner Dr. Line would call me back before noon, but I wouldn’t be able to come in because Dr. Line was handling Dr. Grosh’s patients, his own patients, plus overflow patients that came in. Meanwhile, Bodie (my car guy) texted me that he could come by and jump my Gran Torino which had been sitting idle in my auxiliary garage for weeks. The battery was pretty badly drained, and though I was in too much pain to drive it much this particular day, I told him to come by. Bodie’s schedule is extremely busy so I took the opportunity to have him come by. I lugged myself out of bed, met Bodie at the garage and we charged up the car. It ran for quite a while as we chatted. The battery was charged up nicely, I shut it off and headed back to bed. On my way back to my house, I ran into a neighbor of mine who said his wife has been in the hospital since February with cancer. Boy, could this day get any worse?! I wished him the best and headed home. Luckily before noon Dr. Line called and said that based on my record, he could see that I was prone to allergies and sinus problems. He prescribed me some antibiotics and my assistant Sara went to pick them up for me later in the day as I lay drugged up in my bed. I slept all afternoon and got up in the evening to walk Roxy. It felt nice to get outside, as it was a really warm day. I came back in to lay on the couch with an ice pack on my face. When I got up I wanted to see how I felt before I took any more painkillers. But I had a headache, a jaw ache, and the toothache was still excruciating. Because the roots of your teeth are so long, they almost touch your lower sinuses in your head. If those sinuses get inflamed and expand, they start putting pressure on the nerves of your teeth. And that’s exactly what was going on in my world. I sure hope those antibiotics kick in soon! I slept on the couch with an ice pack on my face until late evening. I got up around 1am to do auditions (that was a chore…talking when your mouth hurts), and feed Roxy. Again the pain was excruciating. So, more Advil and more Anbesol! But I had been using so much Anbesol since last Saturday I was starting to run out! Maybe I can go in to see my dentist on Tuesday and have him give me a whopper of a novacaine shot to numb me for several hours so I can eat a decent meal. I fed and walked Roxy on a beautiful, warm night. Then I made some soup and watched another episode of “Search.”

Tuesday the 8th – TOOTHY TUESDAY! – I got up around 9am and took more meds, then got up at 11 to walk Roxy. I was taking so many meds that I had to start writing down what I was taking so I didn’t have any redundancies. Advil, Sudafed, antibiotics, Vicodin, etc. I decided to just try and sleep through it as much as possible until those antibiotics kick in and kill this thing. I would sleep for a few hours, then get up for a few hours, then take some pills, and go back to sleep for a few hours with an ice pack on my face. I was hoping that the cold would constrict the swollen sinuses and leave the roots of my teeth alone. Sara came over with more icepacks and some more Anbesol. On days like this I’m sure glad I have an assistant to help out! I’m thinking Wednesday I’ll try not taking any painkillers at all and see how bad the pain is without them, just to see if I’m getting better. The level of pain you experience is the barometer by which you gauge your healing. I made some chili for lunch and went back to bed. Poor Roxy was pretty confused by the whole thing. This was so out of routine for her. When I got up at 10pm I vowed to not take any more painkillers to see what the level of pain was. The excruciating pain was over for the most part (thank God!) but it was not settling into simple discomfort. I did work around the house, did my auditions, then picked up Sara to get some groceries and some food at Taco Bell. The pain was starting to get worse again, but nothing like the beginning of the week. I did some more work around the house. It felt good to be productive again. I made some beef stew and watched another episode of “Search” before turning in at 8am. My plan was to sleep all day Wednesday, and hopefully by Thursday I would be feeling completely well again!

Wednesday the 9th – RESTLESS! – I couldn’t take lying around any longer. I got up and tried the Torino to take it for a spin. But nothing. The battery was already drained again. RATS! I’m thinking maybe my battery had gone bad. I hopped in my trusty Mustang and got my mail at my box. Then I went to a second-hand clothing store and got a gray sweatshirt for my latest Halloween Boy figure in the Chaney Room…Barnabas Boy! He’s wearing a vintage 1968 Ben Cooper Barnabas Colllins “Dark Shadows” Halloween costume, and holding in his hands a 1968 “Dark Shadows Digest” from Gold Key Comics. (It’s all about the details, ya know!) I hit Bed, Bath and Beyond to get some shelving units for the newly cleaned and reorganized Puppet Room closet. Then I headed home to feed Roxy and Spook. I worked on putting together the shelving units, which took about a half hour, and finished up by organizing all of the empty hangers I had left over from my great closet “purge” of last week. I have about 200 hangers of all different types and I had to organize them in groups for storage. Or maybe I’ll give them to Goodwill. I was feeling MUCH better (THANK YOU DR. LINE!) but still needed the anti-inflammatory power of an occasional Advil now and then. I took a nap on the couch with an ice pack, then got up around 11:30 to do an audition, feed and walk Roxy, and hit the hay with some TV and a pizza. I was starting to be able to chew on my left side again and it was a beautiful thing!

Thursday the 10th – BACK TO WORK! – I started the day by driving to my seamstress Karyn’s shop and doing some work on projects. She’s not only good, but she’s really fast and efficient! I headed over to Guns Direct to get some guns cleaned. I dropped them off and headed to Studiopolis to do an episode of “Naruto” as a character named Shin. It’s a fairly emotional episode and we had a lot of fun doing it. When we finished up I went back to Guns Direct to pick up my guns. And I spotted a CZ Rami 2075 sub-compact 9mm pistol and I just had to have it. So I filled out the paperwork and paid the freight. I took my guns and headed home. I’ll return on Monday the 21st to pick up my new acquisition. I stopped at AutoZone to pick up a new battery jump starter. I began to think that maybe my jump starter was old, so I bought a newer model. When Bodie hooked his up to my Torino it fired right up. But when I attached mine…nada. When I got home I walked Roxy, and grabbed a nap on the couch. I was feeling MUCH better, and it felt really good to be back at work again. My jaw was still sore, but nothing like earlier in the week. I did some auditions, and prepared for up upcoming weekend trip to the Hollywood Collector Show. I made a light dinner and watched another episode of “Search” before bed.

Friday the 11th – FREEDOM FRIDAY! – One of the benefits of not working five days a week on “The Tonight Show” any longer is freedom to travel and make spontaneous decisions about travel. I got up at 10 and headed to Voicecasters in Burbank. I had to be there at 11 to do another ISDN session for a videogame trailer I’ve been working on for the past few weeks. The lines keep getting rewritten and re-recorded, which is fine by me. It pays all the same! When I finished the short session, I went downstairs to their casting department and read for an Applebee’s radio commercial. It’s always fun to do auditions like that because the script specifically calls for the actor to improvise and add their own stuff. In fact, I’ve done stuff in auditions before that have actually been used in the final recording scripts. One time, the producer didn’t cast me for the part, but used a line I came up with. And they paid me $100 for it! Honest producer! When I finished up I sped by my mailbox and picked up some new caps I had been expecting. They are caps with gray crowns, and navy blue bills. I’m throwing together a 1966 Batman tribute cap, complete with embroidered vintage Bat emblem on the front, and blue satin bat ears on the sides…just like those on Adam West’s cowl! For one cap, I’m even experimenting with putting a bat cape on the back…to keep the sun off my neck! We’ll see how they turn out. As soon as I got the caps I took them over to Mr. Stitch in Sherman Oaks to have them embroidered. The first pass at the Adam West emblem I sent them didn’t turn out so well. I have a scan of an original Adam West Bat emblem that came right off one of his screen-used tunics. I sent that to them as the example. But their digitizer must’ve thought something was wrong and cleaned it up digitally! Oh no no no! Those bat emblems on the 1966 show were hand created and were meant to be asymmetrical! So I had them redo them design so it looked more like the original. I printed the original bat emblem on a full sheet of paper, then I printed their version. I fastened them together and put them on my window as a makeshift light table. Then I could trace around their bat emblem to show them how their dimensions were off from the original. The owner of Mr. Stitch said that helped tremendously. On my way home I stopped by CVS and got some more of my prescription nose spray, since I was running out fast. I got home and finished packing and headed out the door by 4pm. Sara had come over to watch the house and the animals for the weekend while I was down by LAX at the Westin Hotel at the Hollywood Collector Show. I spent about an hour and a half in Friday afternoon drive-time traffic, and finally got to the hotel to check in around 5:30. I got to my room, threw down my luggage and grabbed a quick nap. My pal Amanda drove over to say hi, but spent 45 minutes knocking at my door. I was SOUND asleep and never heard her knocking! That sinus infection really took it out of me I guess! When I woke up at 7:45 she said she had been outside waiting for almost an hour! I felt like a real heel! We headed over to the LAX firing range and met up with my pal Patrick Smith, the former sound mixer from “The Tonight Show.” I hadn’t seen Patrick since the show closed, so it was fun to catch up. He was there with his wife and his Godson. What a great time! I brought my .40 caliber Sig Sauer Equinox, and my .44 Magnum. Patrick and I were in lanes 1 and 2 at the end of the row. And when I fired the .44 Magnum, I looked to my right and saw that all the other shooters had stopped what they were doing and had turned to see what the hell I was shooting that was making that loud noise! Everyone’s jaws were on the floor. Too funny! Patrick loved shooting it, and even his Godson loved it. He was actually pretty good with it! We grabbed dinner at a Mexican restaurant afterwards and had a great time chatting and catching up. Patrick is now mixing “American Idol” and having a blast. As we parted company, he gave me a terrific gift! The Neumann P48 microphone which was the microphone I used to open the “The Tonight Show!” Amazing! And the headphones I used as well! What a pal! I headed back to the hotel to rest up for what was sure to be a VERY busy Saturday!

Saturday the 12th – TORRID TONY TALES AT TWO! – I met up with Sara in the lobby of the Westin so we could hit the autograph show. She wouldn’t be staying long, as she had to go walk Roxy and feed Spook. I had been wanting to meet the legendary Hugh O’Brien since I had been enjoying his work as Hugh Lockwood in the “Search” TV series on DVD. I had four things for him to sign, and after signing the first one he excused himself to go to the restroom. I waited, and waited, and waited. After 20 minutes I explained to his wife that I needed to see some other people, but since I had already paid for the other photos, I’d come back later and pick them up when he was back at his table. He must’ve gotten called out on an important case! I ran into my friends James and Officer Mark who had just arrived. And I ran into my old pal Tony Clifton! The producers of the Hollywood Show had wanted to get Clifton at the show and asked if I could make the contact. I did, and Clifton was there! I was wearing my new Tony Clifton bowling shirt, that I had designed and had fabricated by my seamstress Karyn Hutchinson. (Little did Tony know, that I had one made up for HIM too that I would give him later!) I spoke with William Schallert for a bit about his work in one of my favorite comedy films of all time…”Tunnel Vision!” Officer Mark wanted to get a group shot with the leads of “Flash Gordon,” Sam J. Jones and Melody Anderson. But it was getting close to lunch time, so I told Clifton to meet us downstairs at the Daily Grill at 2 for lunch. We were joined by my two new friends Tony Mei and his girlfriend Crystal. Tony regaled us with torrid tales about his crazy adventures, and I’m not entirely sure Tony and Crystal (who had never heard of Tony before) appreciate the sometimes “salty” nature of his stories. But the rest of us were eating them up as heartily as the heaping lunch before us. In fact, other tables were looking at us because we were all laughing so hard! I went back to the show and met up with my pal Edi, who had just arrived. Sara handed off her pass to Edi, since she had to get running to tend to the pets. I gave Clifton his shirt and he was amazed. We took a picture together and he said it’s the only time he would allow himself to smile in a photo, because he was so elated to have the shirt! (After looking at the photo I’m not sure what he’s doing passes for a smile, but whatever…it’s Tony Clifton!) We hung out at the show until about 5, and Tony Mei was elated he got to meet Richard “Jaws” Kiel from “The Spy Who Loved Me!” He said that was the only villain he remembered from the Bond series, as it scared him to death as a kid. Edi, Tony, Crystal and I went back to my room to rest up before the big “jam session” concert at 6 in the second floor theatre of the LAX Westin. My pal Bruce Kulick and his new wife Lisa were there as he had just completed soundcheck. The concert got started about 40 minutes late, but it was well worth the wait. We heard music from the original members of The Buckinghams, the Drifters, Manfred Mann, Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods, and Chuck Negron from Three Dog Night brought down the house in the finale. But watching Bruce on stage with Tony Clifton blew my mind! You couldn’t imagine two more different individuals, but there they were! Enjoying each other’s unique gifts. Bruce’s amazing guitar jam with Shalamar’s Micki Free was astounding! Crystal enjoyed hearing Ron Dante, the original singing voice of Archie in The Archies, sing “Sugar Sugar!” The concert went for 2 hours and 20 minutes! What a night! What a show! Edi, Tony, Crystal and I drove over to Marina Del Rey to have dinner at Jerry’s Famous Deli. It was the perfect way to get out of the hotel and unwind after a VERY busy day! Then I went back to my hotel room to settle in. I showered up and got ready for bed as I listened to some tunes on my iPad. As I turned out the lights and looked out my 6th floor window at the lights of LA at 1 in the morning, I got very reflective, introspective and thankful about how amazing life is. What a great, mellow way to end the day!

Sunday the 13th – HOME AND DRY! – At 7am sharp I was awakened by a knucklehead shouting outside the hotel with a megaphone. I sprang from my bed from a very comfortable sleep to see what the deal was. It was a small picket group holding signs and chanting slogans. I don’t know what their cause was, but they immediately lost my support and sympathy with their horrible timing. For occasions such as these, I always pack some hefty earplugs in my luggage. I ran to my shaving kit in the bathroom to grab them, popped them in my ears, put a thick pillow over my head and tried to get a few more hours of sleep. GRRRRRR! I got up at 10 and packed up to leave. I stashed my luggage downstairs in the hotel storage and went back into the autograph show to say goodbye to some people. I chatted with some people until about noon and then made my way out of the hotel. The traffic on Sunday afternoon was absolutely horrible. One of the major side streets was closed, which forced all the overflow traffic on to the freeway. To make matters worse, there was an accident up ahead with some motorcyclists and part of the freeway was closed down too! It took me about an hour and a half to get home! I got home just before 2 and settled in. Roxy had really missed me. I napped for about an hour then got up for evening church. Edi’s dog Bunny was still at my house, so I packed her up in her little bag, put Roxy on her leash and we all went to evening church. The dogs are always a big hit! I got home and did some work and grabbed a nap on the couch. I got up around 11:30 to do my auditions, unpack my luggage, and do some work around the house. I made some Spaghetti-O’s and watched the second to the last “Search” episode. It sure feels good to be able to chew on my left side again!

And how was YOUR week??!!

PIX FROM THE WEEK

My latest purchase in hardware…a CZ “Remi” 9mm. I’ll get it on the 21st of April! Compact and beautiful!

My latest addition to The Chaney Room…another Halloween boy haunts the house in an original 1968 Ben Cooper Barnabas Collins Halloween costume and mask. The price tag on it still says $1.98, though it cost me considerably more than that on ebay!

Here’s little Barnabas boy with big Barnabas. The three Halloween Boy figures in The Chaney Room are a metaphor for my younger self who, though clad in mere dimestore Halloween costumes, imagines himself to be adorned in a costume equivalent to that of his TV idols!

At this past weekend’s Hollywood Collector Show my assistant Sara meets Flash Gordon himself, Sam J. Jones!

Saturday night most all of the musicians who attended the autograph show got together for a huge jam session, emceed by Tony Clifton himself! What a show!

Seeing my two pals, Bruce Kulick and Tony Clifton together on one stage just about blew my mind! Too cool!

Bruce and Mickey Free of Shalamar have a guitar shred-off!

At the show I awarded Tony Clifton with his own custom-made Tony Clifton Bowling Shirt, made by Karyn Hutchinson!

My pal James has his own notoriety at the show from the time he met Robert Conrad!

Tea for Two with Tony at 2!

At lunch, the gang was enthralled with many of Tony’s Torrid Tales, though they weren’t for the faint-of-heart!

Here’s a picture where you just can’t have too much “flash!” Posing with our very own “flash” attachment is Sam J. Jones, Flash Gordon himself, along with Melody Anderson who played Dale Arden!