I promised myself that I wouldn’t post any more Christmas songs for the year, but since Christmas was this past week all I’ve been humming are Christmas songs. But this one is awesome! I first heard it on Sonic Tap and thought it was a doo-wop group doing a bad Elvis or Bing Crosby impression. When I looked at the monitor to see who the group was, I was ASTONISHED! Do yourself a favor, listen to this song BEFORE you read who the artist is so you’ll be as astonished as I was. HINT: The lyric change from ‘just like the ones I used to know” to “NOT like the ones I used to know” will make sense after you find out who the artist is. Though it sounds like it was recorded in a tin pail, here’s “White Christmas” by….
… Bob Marley and the Wailers!
Monday the 19th – SIX MORE DAYS! – We are now entering the final week before Christmas! I got up around noon, recorded a couple of bits for “The Tonight Show” in my home studio, e-mailed them off to the producers then hit Taco Bell for some lunch. I stopped by my mailbox to pick up some packages, then headed over to NBC to tape the show. On the way home I stopped off to feed my friend Kristy’s two cats…Oscar and Evie (Affectionately known as Osky and Evus). I headed home, did some work around the house and then laid down for some “Christmas Nappies” on the couch, with the fireplace blazing, the Christmas lights lit, and the Christmas music playing softly on the satellite’s Sonic Tap Christmas channel. When I awoke I met my pal Chuck McCann and my assistant Sara for a late dinner at DuPar’s. Then I got home to do some auditions in my home studio and e-mail them to my agents for submission. Before bed I had some pumpkin pie, popcorn and pineapple. UGH. The “4 P’s” ended up being a VERY bad idea before bedtime. They did NOT mix well!
Tuesday the 20th – TWO-GUN TWOSDAY! – In the morning my cat Spooky got up on the bed to “cuddle me awake.” I gave him a snack, then got ready for the day. I hit my mailbox to get packages, and then went to Gun World in Burbank to pick up my two new gun purchases. In California when you buy a gun, you have to wait 10 days so they can do the background check. It also serves as a “cooling off” period for those who may be buying weapons for a less than gentle reason. Today was the day I got my brand new, nickel-plated 1911. It’s made by Rock Island and unlike most model 1911’s which shoot .45 caliber rounds, this one shoots a round called a .38 super. Apparently in some parts of the world .45 rounds are difficult to obtain. So they designed this particular model to fire the more easily obtainable (at least in those countries) .38 super bullets. I also got another Walther PPK. This is a Walther PPK-S that’s been blued. It has a beautiful cherry wood grip on the stock. The Walther PPK has been the gun of choice for James Bond since the early days of the character. So it’s very popular. I have a Walther PPK (which shoots 6 rounds), a Walther PPK-S in stainless steel (which shoots 7 rounds), and now I have a blued Walther PPK-S. It’s lovely! In “the people’s republic of California” you can only buy Walther PPK’s used. For some stupid political reason they fell off the list of sellable guns in California, and if Smith & Wesson (the company who owns the license to make Walthers) decided they wanted it back on the list, they would have to pay a hefty fee, as well as redesign the gun to comply with all sorts of new regulations for gun designs. It’s nuts. But I have three and I’m very happy with them. Of course if I hear of another one coming available soon, I may buy that one too. I give all my handguns names so it’s easily discernible which one I’m talking about. Even though I have a couple of the same type of models, it’s easier just to refer to them by their nickname. For example, the nickel-plated 1911 is “Nick.” The new Walther PPK-S is “Walt.” I also have Jimmy, Slick, Tony, Sean, Artie, Dave, Ken, Kit, Matt and Stubby. After I was finished at Gun World, I went to Studiopolis and did a half hour’s worth of voicework on the “Bleach” anime cartoon. I don’t know how long I’ve been the voice of Renji, but I think it’s going on 5 years, if I’m not mistaken. Wow! I went to NBC to tape “TTS” and then if was off to feed the kitties again. I drove home to meet up with my masseuse Emily and I got a great, relaxing massage. Then Emily, Sara, my friend Alex and I all met at Little Toni’s for a late dinner. I went home to do my auditions and noticed how late it had gotten. No Christmas Nappies for me tonight!
Wednesday the 21st – CHRISTMAS WIND-DOWN! – Only a few day left of the week and everyone was getting ready for the break. I hopped in the Gran Torino and headed over to Kalmenson and Kalmenson for an audition. Then I drove over to my pal Bodie’s shop so he could look at a few minor issues I was having with the Torino. It looks like he may need to replace a spring under the car on the driver’s side, as the car is just slightly slanted to the left. The amount of space between the tire and the wheel well on the back left is slightly less than the distance on the rear right. At this point it’s negligible, but I want to get it replaced before it becomes more of an issue. I took Bodie and his crew to lunch at Acapulco and we had a great time eating the Mexican buffet and cracking jokes. Then I got a call from my agent that I was needed early at “TTS” so I hopped in the Torino and headed over to NBC. I finished the bit and then hung out until the taping. The Turtleman was on the show again and he’s always super entertaining. What a fun guy! After the show I fed Osky and Evus, then went home to meet up with my pal Scott Zillner. He wanted me to sign a few “Invader Zim” items for a friend’s Christmas gift. I threw in a few items of mine I had laying around to help make it an even beefier Christmas gift! Then I met my pal Edi for dinner at Jerry’s Famous Deli. I came back home to do some work, including finishing painting my Elvis suit. The replica Elvis jumpsuit I had been given by my good pal Mike in Chicago for my Elvis robot, was a great replica suit. But it needed a little work to look even more amazing. On the original Elvis “Aztec Sundial” suit, there are several colors, gold, yellow and brown. The original suit is beautiful, dynamic and has a lot of different layers and dimensionality. The replica suit was pretty amazing, but needed a bit of “spicing up.” So I got some brown paint and painted areas on the sundial brown to bring out some of the design aspects that previously had gone unnoticed. But it’s touchy work, since you’re painting on fabric. Lots could go wrong. So I had to be very careful! But it was really going well! As you can see from the photos here, the brown really defines the design. In fact, without the brown added, you really can’t even tell there’s a face in the middle of the sundial!
Thursday the 22nd – I’LL HAVE A BROWN CHRISTMAS! – Brown seemed to be the predominant color of this Christmas. Brown paint for my Elvis suit, and now a great jacket and some boots! After the taping of “TTS”, I went over to It’s a Wrap in Burbank to check out some clothing items. I found two pair of really great boots. They were size 12s, a little larger than my size 11 feet, but it wouldn’t matter. One pair was a cream color, and the other pair was just a shade darker. I also spotted some snakeskin boots that were size 11.5, but I didn’t get them. But the find of the night was a brown leather jacket that looked so much like Fonzie’s original jacket it made me look twice! It’s a newer jacket, but the closest thing to a Fonz jacket I think I’ve ever seen. Small collar so you can upturn it to look cool, knit bands on the cuffs and around the waist. It was marked at $100 but darn well worth it. I took all my stuff to the front counter and found out that sale items were 50% off, new items were 30% off! So my Fonz jacket was actually only $70! My boots were about $20 each! What a deal! I think I may have Henry Winkler sign it somewhere someday. That would be…uh…COOL! I went to feed my friend’s cats and played with Evie for awhile. I stopped by McDonald’s to get some food, then took some relaxing “Christmas Nappies” with my cat Spooky. When I got up I got a text from my pal Mark Evanier, producer, director and writer of “The Garfield Show,” saying that he was in my area and wanted to know if I wanted to meet for a late dinner. I said sure, and we had an enjoyable time as Mark would dazzle me with one great story after another! I got home, did some more work on the Elvis suit with my brown paint and looked at the clock. It was Friday morning around 8am! I had to go to bed so I could make sure to get up for the final day of “TTS” before our holiday break! YIKES!
Friday the 23rd – CHRISTMAS EVE EVE!” – I only slept a few hours and then headed into NBC for the final taping of 2011. I drove the Torino to my box to pick up some more packages, then went to NBC. My friend Mark the Cop and his girlfriend Connie were in the audience because Chris Isaak was on the show. They’re huge Chris fans, so I try to get them tickets every time he’s on. He sure is a talented guy! Another talented guy is Terry Bradshaw, who was also on the show. Mark, Connie and I stood at the end of the NBC driveway talking and Terry Bradshaw’s truck drove down and stopped so he could sign autographs for all of the waiting fans. What a swell guy to do that! Then I went to It’s a Wrap to pick up those snakeskin boots I saw the night before. I slept on it, and decided to go get them. I’m glad I did! I also got a pair of blue suede high heeled boots for Edi’s Christmas gift. That way if we go to Graceland again, she’ll have her own blue suede boots to wear! When I came out to put the stuff in the car I noticed three people standing outside my Torino taking pictures. One of the guys, Alex, was a huge car fan and started asking me all sorts of car questions I didn’t know the answer to. He reminded me of my pal Bodie Stroud. Alex said he was a big fan of Bodie’s so I got Bodie on the phone and he talked to Alex and even invited him over to tour his shop! What a great Christmas story Alex will have to tell his friends this year! While we were talking Hanna, the female of the trio, was studying my NBC ID badge which was still on my shirt. She said, “Your name sounds familiar.” So she looked me up on her i-Phone and found out I worked on “Invader Zim.” Come to find out she’s a huge fan of the show. So it was nice meeting her and telling her stories about working on the show. The other guy, Sean, was a computer genius and offered to help me out with any computer problems I may have. I asked him, “Where were you about 3 weeks ago?!” We all had a good laugh as I recounted the hell I’ve been going through with my new computer. I gave them my card and urged them to call me so we could get together again. That encounter really made my night! You just never know who you’ll run into! I got some Taco Bell and went to feed the kitties. No, I didn’t feed them the Taco Bell…that was for me. They got catfood. Then I went home and started working feverishly on my Elvis suit again! I took some brief Christmas Nappies, but then Edi and my friend Amanda showed up so we could go to dinner. We went to DuPar’s, but unfortunately we got seated next to a very loud group of annoying people. What’s the name of that new movie? Extremely loud and incredibly close? Well, they were. When we finished I got home and took Christmas Nappies on the couch until dawn. Then I got up and went to bed to sleep for a few hours before my maids arrived to clean Planet Wallywood!
Saturday the 24th – FIRST IN TEN! – I got up to let the maids in, and then went back to bed while they worked. When it was time to clean my bedroom, I got up and worked on the computer for awhile. Then I got ready to run my Christmas Eve errands. I went to Bed Bath and Beyond (which was packed!) and picked up a lot of items. Thank God I had the Torino because all the stuff I got wouldn’t have fit in the Mustang! In anticipation of my major garage renovation and reorganization project I’m going to undertake over the holiday break, I bought 8 banker boxes at Staples. On my way to get lunch at Carl’s Jr. I passed a pet adoption that was going on in front of Bookstar on Ventura Blvd. in Studio City. They had all sorts of adoptable doggies in cages on the sidewalk. Shoppers would walk by and see the doggies and hopefully adopt them. I had been pretty good about remaining unmindful about the fact that this is the first Christmas in ten years that I haven’t had Sassie with me. All of a sudden the euphoria I was feeling about Christmas Eve and everything that goes with it, was subsiding and giving way to sharp sadness. I drove the Torino past the adoption site slowly, trying to see the doggies through the rapidly forming tears in my eyes. Then I saw the saddest thing I’ve seen in a long time. A little Chihuahua mix dog that was in a cage on the sidewalk, was looking up at the people that were passing by him. But no one walking by spent time to look down at him or notice that he was looking for attention. The look in his eyes was so sad, as if to say, ‘Please notice me!” I took solace in the fact that I’m sure he would be getting lots of pets and love from his foster family later if he didn’t get adopted. So I told myself to get out of the funk, since I was listening to my favorite Christmas music on my i-Pod and driving a beautiful 1974 Gran Torino. I had every reason to be thankful and happy! People were honking and waving because they loved the car. So that picked up my spirits considerably. I drove by Rusty’s Discount Pets in the hopes that Rusty the collie would be there, but I didn’t see him outside. I drove by my church but the living nativity scene wasn’t set up yet. On my way to feed Kristy’s cats, a gal started talking to me at a stoplight. She said she has a shoe company in Studio City that had gotten some publicity on “TTS” recently. She said she loved the Torino and I wished her happy holidays. After feeding Kristy’s cats (today I changed Evie’s name from Evus to Christmas Evie) I went back to the church but still no action. So I dropped off all the stuff I bought at home, and then drove to one of Kristy’s friends’ house to drop off her keys. I had been watching the cats for a week, and now it was Tina’s turn to watch them until Kristy returned. I went back to the church and the living nativity was in full swing. Lots of people and animals! I got a lot of great shots. I parked the Torino and got my Mustang back out and drove home. I worked on painting the Elvis suit until I literally couldn’t see straight any more. I got a short nap and then got up for the candlelight Christmas eve service at my church. It started at 11 and went until 12:05. My friends Gary and Amy (I used to work with Amy at 94.7 The Wave), their friend Elia, Josh and his brother Joe and I walked over to the service. The service always ends with an acapella singing of “Silent Night” as the sanctuary is lit only by the congregation holding lit candles. It’s stunningly beautiful, and the music for the service was amazing! After everyone left, I turned on the Christmas music on the satellite and worked on the Elvis suit some more. I set up one of the shoe racks I bought that day, I washed clothes, did a ton of work around the house, and then got ready for bed. Before I went to sleep I watched the Six Million Dollar Man Christmas episode called “A Bionic Christmas Carol.” Fun! What a very enjoyable Christmas Eve 2011!
Sunday the 25th – HAPPY CHRISTMAS! – I slept in pretty late, but I got up around 2 because my friends Scott and Vickie Sebring were bringing over a Christmas ham dinner! Vickie texted me earlier in the day saying that she “overbought” dinner items, and if there was anyone I knew who wanted to eat, I should invite them. I don’t Tweet or Facebook, but I sent out an old-fashioned mass-text message to friends who may be interested in joining us for a feast. In addition to Scott, Vickie and I, we were joined by Edi and her kids Josh and Emily, Josh (a different Josh) and his brother Joe, Emily (a different Emily), Bruce Kulick and his girlfriend Lisa and his dog Joe, Miriam and her dog Charlie Brown, my old pal Chris Malmin, my friend Alex and her mom Penny who was visiting from Arizona, and her dog Lady. WOW! I hadn’t counted on that many people so my plates went fast. I didn’t have any large plastic or paper plates, but we made do with smaller paper plates I had on hand. I ate my Christmas dinner off of a pizza pan! FUN! We chatted all evening about all sorts of things. It was a GREAT impromptu Christmas feast, and thanks to Scott and Vickie for making it all happen! I settled down for the last Christmas Nappies of 2011. I got up later to do things around the house. Like take down the Christmas decorations, finish the painting on the Elvis costume, start work on snazzing up the Elvis belt, organizing my video and DVD cabinet, and box and store old tapes I no longer need in my cabinet. I had the Christmas music playing on the satellite but didn’t have the heart to turn it off, because I knew that Christmas was really over. But then something magical happened! The song “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by Andy Williams came on the satellite channel! My personal Christmas tradition is that when I hear that song after Thanksgiving, on the radio or in passing, that signifies to me that Christmas is really underway! I heard it this year while eating lunch with my friend Esme Bianco at the Coral Cafe in Burbank on November 29th! I ushered in the Christmas season with that song, and now that would be the last Christmas song I would hear for the 2011 season. NEAT! After the song finished I shut off the stereo and went upstairs to go to bed. But by the time I got to sleep (after watching more “Six Million Dollar Man”) it was way past dawn!
Monday the 26th – YAWN! – In fact, I didn’t get to sleep until about 10am! But I slept until 4pm. Woke up, checked e-mail, saw that nothing was really going on, then went back to bed with Spook. When I finally arose for good around 7pm, I called Edi and my friend Emily and invited them to dinner at Miceli’s. I saw my pals Brad and Marci there, and wouldn’t’ you know it?! I also ran into the shoe gal who I saw at the stoplight on Saturday! She was there eating with her husband! Of all the weird things. Of course, there are NO accidents in life, so we spent another 45 minutes chatting after dinner was over. Edi’s starting her own clothing line, and Kate makes shoes. So it was awesome that they got a chance to talk and compare notes. Kate’s husband Logan is a musician so we had lots to chat about as well. Funny how life works, isn’t it? When I got home I set about finishing up the Elvis belt. My robot Elvis is going to be the best dressed Elvis robot in the world. (Come to think of it, it may be the ONLY Elvis robot in the world!) I also continued working on cleaning out and reorganizing my DVD/video cabinet. BIG job!
And how was YOUR Christmas?!!
Pics from the Week
Evie the cat lounging around waiting for her dinner.
She would lay on my feet in an attempt to prevent me from leaving.
Mary and Joseph in my church’s living nativity. I’m not sure they had nail polish and tennis shoes in 0 B.C., but when the hay.
The animals were all about the kids with food!
Our donkey friend who is a regular visitor to our annual living nativity.
